Trust me I’m not contrarian

By Soham Mukherjee

Trust me I’m not contrarian
I don’t disagree with you because I don’t like you
Or because I’m the arrogant prick that you think I am
It’s your complacency that I don’t trust
It’s your dismissive nature I can’t stand

Trust me it’s difficult
Always arguing, always fighting
It’s tiring, I want to give up every day
Every time someone I care about, a little or a lot, makes me want to tear my hair out

Trust me I find it very hard
I wish I could keep my peace at every turn
Keep quiet, let it be, let it go as it were
Maybe if I did, I’d have more friends
I’d know more people if they didn’t repel me as soon as they started speaking
I wish I’d been more patient with them
I wish I’d tried to convince them
But I did, and that’s why they were repelled
They didn’t like disagreements they said
They thought people should be civil
Not raise their voice, it showed bad culture
Keep quiet, be polite, shut up and listen
As they belted out their speeches

Trust me it doesn’t give me pleasure
To get up and walk out
Trust me it’s not fun
To leave my dinner uneaten
Trust me I find it more and more difficult
To argue with my father
Trust me I don’t enjoy
My nightly arguments with my mother
I wish I could stop, I wish I could give in
I wish could relax, I wish I could be complacent
I’d like some peace of mind
I’d like to give my voice a rest
Because trust me it gives me no pleasure
To have this weight on my chest

Trust me I’m not contrarian
It’s not you I disagree with
Trust me I don’t hate you
It’s your complacency
That won’t let me rest.

Soham Mukherjee is an amateur writer who loves football more than most things. His first book, a collection of short stories, was published last year. 

We also welcome your articles, stories and poems (in Bengali or English) at letters@timesofcorona.com or timesofcorona@gmail.com

One thought on “Trust me I’m not contrarian

  • May 19, 2020 at 12:51 am
    Permalink

    Eta besh bhalo likhechis.

    Reply

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